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I am unequal to the square root of three. As well as many other things.
Here are some things I say or used to say that tell you something about me:
"Japanese rain is so much cooler than American rain!" (stolen from Ann)
"Greetings, fellow non-arachnid."
"♪Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, a dark side, and holds the universe together.♪" (stolen from some random dude named Carl Zwanzig)
"π ≠ √3, so don't eat a cupcake."
「馬鹿な小犬。」
"We'll burn that bridge when we come to it."
"We should start a club."
"We must be evil half-twins or something."
"This solution is suboptimum, but evolutionarily stable."—Martin A. Nowak
"My life is based upon three principles: 'It all depends on your point of view.', 'Most Americans are idiots.', and 'Cool things come in threes.'"
"Don't bite a gift horse in the neck."
"Back, ghosts! No one drinks this blood before Tiresias, Seer of Thebes!"
"Who am I to blow against the wind?"
"Annihilate them, my minions!" - The Deadly Chun, as Dr. Morden
"I am, in fact, happy! Get used to it!!"
"So, if you pat a microwave on the head in the lab frame as it moves at the speed of light, how silly do you look from the point of view of the telephone pole?"

Also, I've been told I make amusing facial expressions when confused.